Challenge Accepted The Royal
by UknownHero
Summary: ONE-SHOT! The last of the Challenge Accepted trilogy! Kasumi Yoshizawa claimed to be the Leader of the Phantom Thieves, but Sae Niijima suspected otherwise. This was supposed to be a quick and easy interrogation. However, it was already too late. Kasumi had accepted her challenge.


...I got bored and re-read Challenge Accepted. Now, instead of long-winded rambling it's... long-winded insanity.

Meh, probably the last one I'll do.

**New Game... Start!**

**Challenge Accepted The Royal  
(By UknownHero)**

Sae Niijima was a prosecutor for a reason. In this male dominated profession, she managed to climb her way to her position by sheer will and determination. She had her faults, sure, but at the end of the day she was still someone to be reckoned with. A woman to be fear in and out of the courtroom. An asset to the police in putting away the biggest of scum in Tokyo. She was the go-to person for even the hardest of cases.

Which was why she was interrogating the Leader of the infamous Phantom Thieves.

Or at least, they claimed to be.

Sae had been chasing after these criminals for the majority of the year, their methods nearly impossible to nail down. Now there's mentionings of another world and other such ridiculous things? What has this world come to for claims like these to be taken so seriously? People have died, for Christ's sake! This all sounded insane.

However… she needed answers and she was willing to believe anything at this point.

But there was one detail she very much doubted.

Kasumi Yoshizawa was not the Leader of the Phantom Thieves.

And yet here she was… beaten, drugged up and barely conscious.

Bastards… at least they didn't do anything else to her.

But she was still a source of information, someone who could blow this case wide open. Sae just needed to break her so she would be given the answer to this year long investigation.

However… Sae was doomed from the start.

Because she made a grave mistake.

And that was underestimating a rebel with a cause.

Sae never saw it coming.

"Now tell me your account of everything." Sae ordered as she checked her watch. Two hours until she was pulled from the interrogation room. Just enough time to break her. "Start from the very beginning."

"The _very _beginning?" Kasumi asked, forcing down the evil smile trying to break from her face.

"Everything. Not a single detail missed." Sae answered as she narrowed her eyes.

Kasumi only smirked.

Challenge accepted.

* * *

**(1:56:09 until interrogation ends)**

"Then this guy with glasses came up to me. He saved me from this asshole who wanted to, like, rape me or something. So he stops the guy and we talk about stuff like how we're both transfers and all the trouble that's been happening with Shujin lately and…"

The drugs had barely affected Kasumi's long-term memory. She was able to recall a surprising amount of detail.

Kasumi had started off on the day she got off that train and arrived at Shujin, saying that was when her life irreparably. At this point the Phantom Thieves were nothing but a bunch of pranksters or students who blackmailed the P.E. Teacher into confessing his crimes.

However… did she really have to detail what she had for breakfast that day? Every day?

Also, what the hell was a _salt bae_?

Sae shook those unnecessary questions out of her mind.

If Kasumi kept talking, the closer she was to her answer.

She just had to be patient.

* * *

**(1:24:32 until interrogation ends)**

"I got this weird letter from someone. It sort of went like… _this is a story about how your humble narrator attempted to institute change. It is also the story of what happened as a result. So let's begin, quite properly, with a brief look at the historical development of the problem, of its attempted solutions, and of the eternal argument about it. It seems clear that Kasumi Yoshizawa will go into the trash can of history with a very black and shameful file full of attempts to see to it that all patriotic endeavors are directed down blind alleys where they end in frustration and discouragement. But we ought to look at the matter in a broader framework before we draw final conclusions on the subject: We see that nothing unites people like a common enemy. That's why I would encourage everybody to take some shots of their own at Kasumi by reprimanding her for relegating persons to the status of things. As caustic as her words are, the baneful nature of her lectures is not just a rumor. It is a fact to which I can testify._

_Kasumi is totally mistaken if she believes that women are crazed Pavlovian sex-dogs who will salivate at any object even remotely phallic in shape. The point is that if everyone spent just five minutes a day thinking about ways to find the inner strength to place a high value on honor and self-respect, we'd all be a lot better off. Is five minutes a day too much to ask for the promise of a better tomorrow? I sure hope not, but then again, Kasumi believes that she is a model citizen. Perhaps it would be best for her to awaken from her delusional, narcoleptic fantasyland and observe that our duty should be to enlighten the mind of Man and improve him as a rational, moral, and social being. To promote a herd mentality over principled, individual thought is alien to this duty. That's why I want you to know that if anything, heathenism, Fabianism, and Maoism follow her footsteps. Wherever Kasumi goes, such things are sure to sprout up. The implication is that it's scary how many people believe that we should derive moral guidance from her glitzy, multi-culti, hip-hop, consumption-oriented disquisitions. That false perception is rooted in Kasumi's public-relations machinery, which uses tactics chillingly similar to those of Big Tobacco: denial, doubt, confusing the public, and even buying the loyalty of bent scientists—at the cost of millions of lives._

_Kasumi's brown-nosing, unsympathetic opinions have given birth to a completely new subspecies in the human race: Kasumi Yoshizawa patsies. This is a curious animal that tends to disregard established wisdom and listen exclusively to what Kasumi has to say. When Kasumi says that her schemes will spread enlightenment to the masses, nurture democracy, reestablish the bonds of community, bring us closer to God, and generally work to the betterment of Man and society, they all repeat that statement like parrots. They refuse to believe that Kasumi is the picture of the insane person on the street, babbling to a tree, a wall, or a cloud, which cannot and does not respond to her grievances. I have taken the liberty of letting her know that she is not interested in what is true and what is false or in what is good and what is evil. In fact, those distinctions have no meaning to her whatsoever. The only thing that has any meaning to Kasumi is ethnocentrism. Why? That's the question that perplexes me the most because Kasumi attracts contumacious schlumps to her crime syndicate by telling them that she possesses infinite wisdom. I suppose the people to whom she tells such things just want to believe lies that make them feel intellectually and spiritually superior to others. Whether or not that's the case, if you are not smart enough to realize this, then you become the victim of your own ignorance._

_There is absolutely nothing that oppugnant slubberdegullions like Kasumi will not do to destroy their opponents. They will poke into the most secret family affairs and not rest until their truffle-searching instinct digs up some adversarial incident that is calculated to finish off their unfortunate victim. She claims to have the perfect solution to all our problems. Alas, Kasumi's solution involves misdirecting our efforts into fighting each other rather than into understanding the nature and endurance of crude nihilism. What bothers me about that is that many people have witnessed her organize a troika of brutal moral weaklings, Pecksniffian vocabularians, and lethargic, temperamental scroungers with the sole purpose of subverting our country's legal system. Kasumi generally insists that her witnesses are mistaken and blames her treasonous dissertations on pompous makebates. It's like she has no-fault insurance against personal responsibility. What's more, if you are not actively weeding out people like Kasumi who have deceived, betrayed, and exploited us, you are abetting her attempt to impact public policy for years to come._

_Kasumi's goombahs are tools. Like a hammer or an axe, they are not inherently evil or destructive. The evil is in the force that manipulates them and uses them for destructive purposes. That evil is Kasumi Yoshizawa, who wants nothing less than to accelerate the natural tendency of civilization to devolve from order to chaos, liberty to tyranny, and virtue to vice._

_Kasumi has been stifling dissent. Should doing so buy her the right to dialogue, negotiation, concessions, and power? I say no because there is no time and little temptation for those who work hard on their jobs and their responsibilities to identify political and religious groups that are Kasumi's political enemies and re-label them as "immature, snooty patrioteers" in order to justify operations against them. I know you're wondering why I just wrote that. I'll explain shortly, but first, I should state that Kasumi fervently believes that character development is not a matter of "strength through adversity" but rather, "entitlement through victimization". This shows that she is not merely mistaken about one little fact among millions of facts but that Kasumi is exceedingly shiftless, uncontrollable, prudish, neurotic, squalid, overbearing, execrable, confused, effrontive, and unbridled. Sorry for the synathroesmus, but there is still hope for our society, real hope—not the false sense of hope that comes from the mouths of gormless extortionists but the hope that makes you eager to fight corruption. While this approach is practical, it is rife with pitfalls because it fails to acknowledge that a true leader leads by example, not by force. An obvious parallel from a slightly different context is that I once heard a couple people ask Kasumi to comment on how she is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others. Kasumi proceeded to bombard these questioners with insults, calling them froward backbiters and the like. Sure, Kasumi has a reputation for laying into her critics, but this inhumane reaction fails to answer the substance of her rivals' points. I used a Complaint Generator to beef up the word count._

_Yes, Kasumi may have some superficial charm, but I want to make this clear so that those who do not understand deeper messages embedded within sarcastic irony—and you know who I'm referring to—can process my point. The morbid individuals that comprise her coterie are as thick as thieves. If one of them is willing to lay all of society open to the predations of organized criminality, then they all are. What's more, none of them is able to accept that she's not your average crass pinchfist. She's the deluxe model. As such, she's definitely poised to teach our children a version of history that is not only skewed, distorted, and wrong but dangerously so sometime soon._

_Whatever anguish of spirit it may cost, I am willing to analyze presentism. The analysis of presentism informs the politics of social movements against presentism, which is important because I'll tell you what we need to do about all the craziness that Kasumi is mongering. We need to demonstrate conclusively that she really ought to to take something for her hysterical paranoia. I've heard that chlorpromazine works well. Doubtlessly, some sort of medication should awaken Kasumi to the fact that she wants all of us to believe that she has been robbed of all she does not possess. That's why she sponsors brainwashing in the schools, brainwashing by the government, brainwashing statements made to us by politicians, entertainers, and sports stars, and brainwashing by the big advertisers and the news media._

_Kasumi's name is synonymous with onanism and racialism. That shouldn't surprise you when you consider that I never used to be particularly concerned about her stances. Any damned fool, or so I thought, could see that it's unfortunate that she has no real education. It's impossible to debate important topics with someone who is so mentally handicapped._

_Although Kasumi occasionally exhibits a passable simulacrum of rationality, according to her, "the truth", "the whole truth", and "nothing but the truth" are three different things. She might as well be reading tea leaves or tossing chicken bones on the floor for divination about what's true and what isn't. Maybe then Kasumi would realize that she has asked her partisans to move prurient, abhorrent communism from the loathsome fringe into a realm of respectability. (There's no explicit mention of providing incorrigible drug addicts with an irresistible temptation to write off whole sections of society, but that's there too if you read between the lines.) This scares me because it's Kasumi's belief that my letters demonstrate a desire to encourage the acceptance of scapegoating and demonization. I can't understand how anyone could go from anything I ever wrote to such a biggety idea. In fact, my letters generally make the diametrically opposite claim, that sometimes I think that Kasumi is simply a willing pawn of those phlegmatic usurers who trample over the very freedoms and rights that she claims to support. I typically drop that willing-pawn notion, however, whenever I remember that by brainwashing her groupies with presenteeism, Kasumi makes them easy to lead, easy to program, and easy to enslave. In the beginning of this letter, I promised you details, but now I'm running out of space. So here's one detail to end with: Ms. Kasumi Yoshizawa hopes to further her geopolitical ambitions by taking us all on an absolutely reckless ride into the unknown._" Kasumi got out. "Yeah, it was weird but it also went on for like 12 more paragraphs. It said…"

What. The. Fuck.

Okay, there wasn't anything on her having photographic memory. Kasumi, other than her talents, was just another high school girl. Her grades were good enough, but this was…

Huh.

That was okay. Everything was still fine as long as she…

* * *

**(0:58:56 until interrogation ends)**

Somehow, this interrogation had turned into a frustratingly detailed dance lesson and, as it turned out, Kasumi was not a nice instructor.

"WHAT DID I TELL YOU, YOU CRUMPET-EATING FAT LARD! YOU SHOULD SHOULD BE GOING LEFT, RIGHT, RIGHT, FORWARD, BACK, RIGHT, LEFT, LEFT, BACK, BACK, NORTHWEST OF EAST SUSSEX AND GO INTO A TWIST THEN JAZZ HANDS! _JAZZ HANDS!__AND I SEE A DEAD FISH CLINGING TO LIFE USING A PUDDLE OF__** COW SEMEN! YOU MADE MAKOTO-SAN CRY FROM YOUR TERRIBLE DANCING! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT!? IS THAT WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS TO EXPERIENCE AFTER WORLD WAR 2 AND THE SURRENDER OF JAPAN after the atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki and the declaration of war by the Soviet Union. In a national radio address on August 15, Emperor Hirohito announced the surrender to the Japanese people by Gyokuon-hōsō. A period known as Occupied Japan followed after the war, largely spearheaded by United States General of the Army Douglas MacArthur to revise the Japanese constitution and de-militarize Japan. The Allied occupation, with economic and political assistance, continued well into the 1950s. Allied forces ordered Japan to abolish the Meiji Constitution and enforce the Constitution of Japan, then rename the Empire of Japan as Japan on May 3, adopted a parliamentary-based political system, while the Emperor changed to symbolic status!?"**_

Sae had no idea how she got convinced to do this but…

Wait a minute. Where the hell did the metal table go? It was bolted to the floor.

"You are like a renegade cop, Niijima-san! A terrible renegade cop, who don't play by nobody's rules until the commissioner assigns him a talking robot dog for a partner who helps him track down the crime syndicate that murdered his family all the while teaching him a little something about life in the process _**THURSDAYS AT NINE**_!"

"What are you talking about!?" Sae demanded.

"DO NOT INTERRUPT THE SENSEI, YOU IDIOT SANDBAG!"

* * *

**(0:53:55 until interrogation ends)**

"WWWWWAAAAAAHHHHHH…!" Kasumi cried out as she slammed her head onto the table. "The puppies… all those puppies… they… they're all gone…!" Kasumi sobbed out.

"Um… Yoshizawa-san…" Sae got out, genuinely concerned for the red haired girl.

"Why Araki…!? They all didn't need to die…!"

Sae felt like this wasn't going to go anywhere any time soon.

May as well use this opportunity to drink.

**(0:49:14 until interrogation ends)**

"...It was a one time thing, I swear! Apart from that second time right after. And the time after that. And the one after that… And that time with Joker… And then Oracle… then Skull… twice…"

Sae didn't want to hear this but she couldn't stop listening.

Did everyone want to fuck her little sister!? And why did she had a more active sex life than her!?

'Stop thinking about that Sae!' The prosecutor quickly thought as she shook her head. 'You can get through this interrogation. _You have to_!'

"...And that time with Ohya-san… then Kawakami-sensei… and then Skull again…"

And thus Sae's internal screaming continued.

* * *

**(0:31:55 until interrogation ends)**

Sae was pretty sure she was in Hell.

"...Inaba was so amazing. The air felt so great and people were so nice, but this place called Aiya was the greatest. It had this Mega Beef Bowl challenge. It is said that you would need Understanding to accept it as a whole, Knowledge to set the proper pace, Courage to attack the mountain of meat and Dedication to keep on eating! All these skills are needed to finish off the MEGA BEEF BOWL! ...That being said, I don't have the Diligence for it unfortunately…"

Why wouldn't she stop talking?

"Oh, then there was the time I found out about the Big Bang Burger Challenge. Since it was so cheap I would eat it pretty frequently. Sometimes I'd mix it up, I would fries, milkshakes, soda, salad, ice-cream, sushi, ramen, gohan, curry rice, fried rice, mochi, okowa, soba noodles, sashimi, mini-burgers, ice-cream… Oops, said ice-cream twice. Um, let me start over from when I visited Port Island for their illegal coffee…"

Sae wished for nothing but for Kasumi to have a heart attack right now just to escape this horror show.

And how does she stay so thin with all the food she eats!?

"Ugh… I'm getting so hungry… Hey, can we get ramen after this?"

* * *

**(0:16:46 until interrogation ends)**

It was official.

Sae wanted to die.

"_La primera vez que vi sus pisadas… Y sus puerto del acero… Supe que había encontrado alguien~!_"

This girl and her terrible singing was slowing killing her, both physically and mentally.

And her poor understanding of the Spanish language just made the sweet embrace of death so much more tempting.

"_Para compartir un verdadero~!_"

* * *

**(0:07:51 until interrogation ends)**

"Can't wait to get back to the truth behind the psychotic breakdowns and mental health issues that you have to use to help you to get to the job right before you start to work with your blue eyes and find out what you can do on older technology even if you are not working with a white dot on your screen or using the sword to make it better for your heart and body and your body to the right of problems along the way while also unintentionally becoming like a little sister to the question of how to get a student to become a teacher in the school of the Phantom Thieves after seeing the distorted desires within people's hearts while getting closer together knowing that the Japanese dubbers wanted to be the Leader of the Phantom Thieves after hating years of bullshit and I am just talking out of my ass and I'm basically just saying words that are automatically coming up in my brain and this is all nonsense like I'm just using autocomplete words to make this entire speech up and are okay, Sae-san?"

"..." Sae said nothing as life slowly drained out of her. She just wanted this day to finally end.

"...You do realise we still have 6 minutes left." Kasumi pointed out.

Amd with that, Sae finally broke down and cried.

* * *

**(0:01:00 until interrogation ends)**

Shut up.

"And thus here I am on this table, telling you my story."

Shut up…

"Of course, that isn't how this story will end."

Shut up…!

"Um… Sae-san?"

shutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutupshutup

"Um… can I borrow your phone?"

Sae silently nodded.

"Er… are you going to do everything I say from this point on?"

Sae silently nodded.

"...Oh, Makoto-senpai is going to kill me afterwards. Give it here."

* * *

**(Some time later...)**

"Was all of that really necessary Kasumi?" Akira asked with a relaxed smile on his face.

"Nope." Kasumi answered as she snuggled closer to the Leader of the Phantom Thieves. It was the day after New Years and despite it being early in the morning, they were watching a movie they were barely paying attention to.

Killing a god. Giving freedom to humanity. That was great and all, but nothing could beat this calm and warm moment in time, wrapped up in a blanket doing nothing but talk and ignore the world.

"I mean, you didn't have to take the fall." Akira got out, remembering the casino. She had taken the case instead of him, she had gotten caught instead of him, she was the one who came to Takemi to heal and flush those drugs out of her system, and she was the one who faked her death. "Kasumi… I…"

"Hey, did it for you and we came out fine in the end. It may have been a rough journey but we're at the end now. Don't worry." Kasumi interrupted as she flashed Joker a cute smile. "And besides… I can't resist a good challenge."

Akira couldn't help but laugh at this before they stared into each others eyes. "Kasumi…"

"Yeah, Akira-kun?"

"You want to…"

"So early in the morning? Oh, you're so bad!"

"But…"

"Akira-kun, do it later." Kasumi got out as she rubbed her cheek on his naked chest. "Let them sleep. We'll get breakfast later."

Akira's eyes quietly drifted over to the unconscious forms of Ann, Makoto, Futaba, Haru, Chihaya, Lavenza, Takemi, Kawakami, Ohya, Hifumi and Sae before going back to the screen. "Yeah. Later." He agreed as he leaned back.

...How the fuck did he manage to get this ending?

**Save Game... Complete!**

...Yep. P5 The Royal isn't even out, but I'm just making assumptions. This could very much be wrong but... meh. It was fun to write.

UknownHero signing out, my friends!


End file.
